How to manage family meals at Christmas

It’s Christmas morning and the kids have been up since dawn, too excited from opening presents to eat anything substantial. Now you’re rushing to get everyone ready for family lunch, knowing full well that it involves chaos, a cheese platter and stacks of chocolate gold coins.

You already know lunch will be at least two hours late. And then there’s the comments about what your kids are (or are not) eating.

Sound familiar? While the holiday season is a joyous time, it’s also not uncommon to feel anxious about how holiday gatherings might affect your child’s eating progress.

Here's the good news: the holidays don't have to derail everything you've worked so hard to achieve.

Why holiday eating feels so challenging

You’re not in control of the menu

At home, you’ve got a bit of a process around feeding your family. You know which foods work for your family, how to include variety alongside safe options, and how to structure meals in a way that reduces stress. But Christmas gatherings? That's a whole different story.

Suddenly, you’re sitting down for meals where there may not be anything your child typically eats, or you’re at a party where the only ‘kid-friendly’ options are chips and lollies.

It's very common to feel anxious about these scenarios, especially when you've been working so hard on expanding your child's eating at home.

Expectations are high

There's so much pressure to have a wonderful time, and make it magical, memorable and special for everyone. Our kids are so attuned to us that they can experience that as a heightened sense of pressure on them at mealtimes. But we know that keeping the pressure down helps to build confident eaters, and is a core part of The Mealtimes Method. When there's a mismatch between what we hope for and what happens it can feel really deflating for everyone.

Unsolicited comments from others

Holiday gatherings often come with a side of unsolicited opinions about kids’ eating habits. You might face comments about your child being ‘too picky’, unhelpful suggestions about how to get your kid to eat something, or discussions about being ‘good’ or ‘naughty’ with food choices. These interactions can feel particularly challenging when you're trying to put a new approach into practice.

What you need to know about holiday eating:

It’s temporary, not permanent

Remember that holiday eating patterns are temporary. A few weeks of different foods, varying schedules and more ‘treats’ than usual won't turn back months of progress. Children are remarkably resilient, and their eating patterns typically return to baseline once regular routines resume.

You can trust your kids

Kids can be surprisingly good at listening to their bodies, and that doesn’t disappear even amid the excitement and abundance of holiday foods. They might eat differently than usual – more at some meals, less at others – but their body’s natural regulation system is still working.

Focus on fun (and not on the food)

The holidays are meant to be enjoyed, and that includes the food experiences that come with them. But food doesn’t have to be the focus. Reframe these gatherings to be about something other than food, for example as a way for you to spend time with family and friends.

Your child's relationship with food is built over years, and isn’t determined by a few weeks of celebrations.

Ready to create a specific plan that works for your family?

Mealtimes members have access to detailed strategies for navigating challenging family dynamics and maintaining your child’s feeding progress at special events. Find out more about the membership options here.

Wishing you and your family a wonderful time together this Christmas.

Dr Kyla

Dr Kyla is a paediatric dietitian with a passion for helping families to feed their children well, without the overwhelm. She has a PhD in childhood weight management and 20 years experience working with restrictive eaters in her clinic and online programs. Kyla is also a mum of two and she knows the struggle today’s parents have with navigating limited time, information overwhelm, picky eaters and societal expectations.