If you’re trying to set kids up to develop a positive and shame-free relationship with food, you might have started switching away from calling foods “good” and “bad”. Maybe you’ve even started to downplay the words “healthy” and “unhealthy”, for the same reason. But here’s where things get murky:
At first glance, “everyday” and “sometimes” foods might seem like a nice alternative to “good” and “bad” foods. But I don’t want you to use those terms either.
Why? Because for children, the message still comes across the same. They quickly learn that “everyday” foods are the “right” choices, while “sometimes” foods are the “wrong” choices. This brings an unnecessary layer of morality (and therefore shame) into meeting the basic human need to eat.
Kids don’t have the cognitive maturity, or the nuance to navigate this area. In fact, many adults struggle to feel at peace with their food choices too. But the good news is, we know how to do better for our kids.
The Food Labels We Give Kids Can Last a Lifetime
In general, I suggest moving away from language that does any of the following:
Instead, I want kids to learn about food without ranking it. This might be just getting familiar with foods served at home, or exploring food characteristics like taste, texture, colour, where food comes from, how we prepare it and how food can be part of different experiences.
So what labels do I recommend?
Well, none really.
If you talk about food, use the name of each item: apple, sausage roll, sandwich, baked potato etc. There’s no need to categorise them in relation to other foods.
You can also use neutral collective terms like fruit, take-away or fast food, veggies, grains, soft-drink, legumes, pastries, meat, biscuits, dessert, dairy etc. The key is to use terms that don’t have morality attached and don’t position one type of food against another. This might be different in every family.
Mealtimes Method
Our job as parents is to make decisions about food and nutrition on our kids' behalf. In primary school, a child's main job is to listen to their body.
Think of healthy eating as a nuanced, grown-up concept, and try to protect children from advanced diet and nutrition talk.
Want to embrace this for your family?
Family Mealtimes members have access to loads of information and support for how this looks in everyday life. The membership is a judgement-free space where we chat regularly about the challenges and the triumphs of helping our kids develop a lifelong confidence with food. Give your kids the kind of positive relationship with food and their body that you wish you had. Join us today!
Expert-led feeding guidance that grows with your child
One membership, three dedicated stages tailored to your child. Start where you need, switch when you want.
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Starting solids
Introducing allergens
Finger food and puree recipes
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Confidence through the chaos
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Weekly family menu
School lunchbox ideas
Navigating body conversations
